I Kill Bunnies


That’s clearly the message intended by the Project Planet doorhanger I found in my room at the Embassy Suites in Philadelphia this week.

A pretty standard concept in hotels these days, Project Planet’s mission is “to protect the environment through conservation of water and decreased use of detergent.” The idea is that they won’t wash your sheets and towels every day unless you hang this sign on your door requesting them to do so. This sign, with a picture of a hopelessly cute bunny, on the outside of your hotel room door – for everyone to see. This sign, which says “Please Change the Linens Today” but clearly means “I am evil, and want you to kill helpless forest creatures for me. The cuter the better.”

Now here’s the thing – I approve of the message, but not the media. It’s not as painfully blatant as those Truth ads, but it is clearly manipulative. I’m a pretty decent guy, and I’m willing to reuse my towels and sheets for a few days at a hotel – I do it at home, after all – but when I feel I’m being manipulated, I just feel an almost overwhelming urge to respond negatively. If you are going to treat me like a bunnykiller, I might just prove you right. Wash my sheets twice a day, and please don’t turn off the taps – I like to keep the water running so that I know it’s good and fresh when I get back to my room. Oh, and by the way – be a dear and have my kittenfur lounging robe drycleaned for me. I’m off to my sealclubbing meeting tonight, and I want to look good.